I haven’t posted in a long time. This was not intentional. I did not anticipating being sideswiped by the pregnancy sick and tired. Now I know.
It’s Lent! I gave up Twitter and Facebook again this year. I love it. Two days later I didn’t even miss it. Plus it leaves more time to make all these blasted OBGYN appointments! :) I do not participate in Lent because I am Catholic although I think that the Catholic church was most certainly on to something in this tradition. I enjoy it because when you give something up (not sin, genius, when you give up an indulgence) it leaves more time and headspace to have a worshipful and contemplative heart coming up to Resurrection Day. (I feel like I may have written a blog post about how the term “Easter” makes my skin crawl so I won’t go there again!)
Honestly, last year was difficult to stay off of those two social networks for 44-ish days. This year it doesn’t feel long enough. Sitting here thinking about it, I have not felt this calm in a long time. It’s a blessing, truly. There less distraction from my husband and pregnancy, less distraction from Scripture and time with the Lord. I feel bad for people who don’t participate, as weird as that sounds. It’s so refreshing!
Next month we get to find out the gender of our baby! Crazy. In five weeks I’ll be to the halfway mark. Thankful this is during Lent because after the halfway mark you have to start thinking about things like how you’re supposed to move the child from inside your gut to outside and the real world – I do not need to have a panic attack. My OB’s metal carjack, err… speculum, gives me enough anxiety as it is! Sorta kinda joking. And as they say, giving birth is the easiest part.
I can’t help but wonder about our child’s personality. Will he have a crazy temper? Will she be painfully shy? Will he love sports and eschew his dad’s love of shooting? Will she be obsessed with music and skip meals to stand in line for shows? Will every chore be a battle or will he or she remember to clean their room? (I know, this one is FAR FETCHED but some parents get that lucky.) How will I disappoint our kid? How will they disappoint us?
A million things to think about. With children, as with marriage, there is no way to plan for every possible contingency. It requires faith. It requires flexibility. It requires dedication and pushing away distractions. It requires planning ahead and having the courage to abandon those plans when necessary.
Congratulations to my sister Alexandra who got engaged today! She’s being a HUGE jerk and asked me to be her matron of honor TWO WEEKS BEFORE MY DUE DATE! AH!!!!!! :)
Do me a favor, kid. Stay put or show up four weeks early. Those are your options. Love, your (not actually in control of any of it) momma.