Letting Go

Needed to take a little break to clear my head! But the disappointment has lifted at least temporarily and I’m having a moment of clarity. I wasn’t going to write about this for a while because I wasn’t quite sure what to say but seeing as I am of clear mind for the present moment, I should share what I am learning. Or rather what I knew but now am being allowed to put into practice.

1) God doesn’t owe me anything.
Not a good life.
Not an explanation.
Not salvation.

Everything he gives is a gift of grace. I deserve hell but he gave me Jesus.

2) When my question to God is “why?” His answer is “do you trust me?”
I have spent a good deal of time asking if we made the right choice moving here. Honestly, not moving here would have been unwise. Everything worked out exactly when it needed to for us to make this transition. Down to the very day Dillinger was born. For all the information I have, we absolutely made the right choice. Which means that where we are right now is where we are supposed to be, regardless of circumstances. Makes ZERO sense to me but that’s what it is.

3) I do not have the right to be angry. At the end of the book bearing his name, God asks Job a series of 80 questions. This after Job had spent some significant time questioning why he was suffering. The questions God asks put Job in his place, essentially stating that God didn’t need to consult Job in creating the planet and he did not need to defend himself when it came to Job’s suffering. By the grace of God, very few of us ever have to experience loss as devastating as what Job went through.

The Lord gives and The Lord takes away, Blessed be the name of The Lord.

4) I am not the main character in God’s story.
I don’t even have a starring role. I am not listed in the credits. The story does not revolve around me. If God can get more glory through our current experience than if everything had worked out the way we hoped? So be it.

Life has its difficult seasons, sure. As John Piper says, what is 80 years of suffering compared to eternal glory? Puts a lot of things in perspective for me.



Filed under personal

4 responses to “Letting Go

  1. Bobbie A.

    God is just bringing you out of exile. Seattle is the promised land. :)

    Miss you guys. Hang in there. The Holy Spirit will give you the strength of Christ. Love you. God is good.

  2. Good stuff. Job is always a really humbling read for me.

  3. Bit Bit

    ERRRybody goes thru hard times. Even now with some members of our family. I swear I was on God’s sh*t list for all of 2012.
    When I was going through all that garbage last year, it literally wasn’t till I took my hands off of it, and trusted God, that anything began to change. For 10 months to a year, I begged and pleaded, fasted, and prayed for hours a day. I even stopped sinning, all in hopes that God to change my circumstance.
    But as soon as I took my hands off, quit my mental gymnastics, and gave it to Lord, things started to fall into place.
    I’m happy I went through that looking back because it taught that nothing is bigger than His love. I don’t care what comes my way, I know it’s all gonna be ok. I don’t even have to figure it out cause He’s got it figure out. Even if the worst thing comes my way, I know I’m in his hands. It’s a weird and new place to be, but I always know I’m gonna be OK. Not because everything that happens to me is from the Lord, but because the Lord is involved in everything that happens to me. He doesn’t run away when it hits that fan lol. Basically, “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil” sums it up. Yes, you might walk through some dark times, but who cares. He’s with you and it’s AAAAWWWL gonna be ok. He upholds me in everything that happens, good or bad. And before you know it, more good things start happening because you rest in his grace and favor. I’m in the right place at the right time more often than not because I’m walking with Him.
    You might not agree with all of this, but I hope this cheers you up.
    ps. I am disguising my ID but you can figure who I am.

    • I don’t quite agree with you on a lot of your points but that’s more because I know where you’re coming from. It’s not what you said per se. Having said that, you do realize that you have successfully become the first human in history to rid yourself of your sin by your own volition right?! Amazeballs! ;)

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