My husband makes fun of me for my long showers. It wasn’t until a few weeks ago that I realized I take long showers because growing up, the shower was the only place I could be in the entire house without hearing anyone else. I wouldn’t leave until the hot water was completely gone.
As a kid, I always wanted to have a large family of my own. I’m the eldest of five and always just assumed I would have more than that. I have no clue why. I grew to abhor the constant noisy chaos of a house that regularly had at least eight children running around. I always wanted my own space and daydreamed of being an only child in a quiet house.
Then I had my own child. It was shocking to say the least. I knew I could deal with the constant waking up and even the crying. But the birth, recovery and learning how to breastfeed were overwhelming. I was convinced I would never have another child for months. However, with some time and gained perspective, things have changed.
Recently, I started nannying for three boys – a 7 year old and twin 5 year olds. Every day Dillin and I head over to their home and live life over there. It has been a really eye opening experience. My first day I was pretty scared that I would quickly be overwhelmed and overrun by boys whose needs I couldn’t meet in an instant. But I have slowly been finding my groove and this last week it hit me. I could totally do this. Four boys? Cake. Girls? I’m still not convinced! But we’ll see.
Experience breeds confidence. That is an important lesson that I need to carry over into my parenting as well. Letting (or making!) Dillinger take the lead and figure things out for himself will produce a lot of great skill. One of my friends in Yakima has 7 kids. I know most moms nowadays would probably die at the the prospect as they can barely handle their own two! No, big families are not for everyone. Kids are not for everyone. But I’m slowly starting to accept the idea of a big family for me.
Picture found here.